Menstruation was not high on my list of priorities in my twenties and awareness of my menstrual cycle only came through charting it for contraceptive purposes. I rarely changed my rhythm to match my changing internal states, although I had noticed the natural high the coming of my period brought. Then a pain so debilitating hit me in my early thirties that I was left feeling gutted. Intense pain, vomiting and diarrhoea which could last on and off for three to four days, followed by complete exhaustion. Menstruation became an enormous monthly upheaval, completely disrupting my life. It also became the opening to a wonderful appreciation of the power and magic of a woman’s cyclical nature, knowledge which helped heal my body.
This pain had a way of focusing my attention like nothing else! My odyssey unfolded. Central to my journey was the rediscovery of the inner life of women through my cycle: Menstruation as a monthly initiatory process that, with awareness, deepened and strengthened my sense of self.
Healing without drugs or surgery
To get well took time and enormous dedication. After a brief foray into orthodox medicine, I realised it had nothing to offer me that was truly healing. My body was already in distress and I felt that drugs, in the long term, would only contribute to that distress.
I wanted to get to the root of the problem and to experience pain-free periods without drugs or surgery. My healing would be an investment for life. My overall health was poor – fatigue, allergies, poor digestion , insomnia and frequent bouts of flu. I never got a name from the medical establishment for my menstrual problems, because to do so would have required surgery. However, I believe I had endometriosis and possibly a prolapsed uterus.
The bedrock of my healing was a combination of self care practices (in particular diet and minimizing environmental pollutants), wonderful support from natural health practitioners, and my growing appreciation of the talents and strengths of the menstrual cycle. I also developed my capacity to enter the experience of the symptoms on their own terms, to allow myself to be changed and led somewhere new.
I began to see my problems as more than purely personal. I suffered in part because of the cultural devaluation of the Feminine, the lack of respect for woman’s ways of accessing and expressing knowledge and power. To heal I had to lift the curse on the menstrual cycle. This was and is public work and meant being an activist in the world.
Pain free
Today, nineteen years on from that first gut-wrenching pain, I am happily pain-free and have been for a number of years, my uterus intact and my health transformed.”
